Last Day

What a hectic last day. At least for just now.

Was saved by the team building programme for my department. Not that I am involved in the team building, but team building means that the only receptionsit of the company will not be in office, and that includes all the other " temporary receptionists" too. Which simply means, I have to take up the role of the receptionist and hence is exempted from what ever else I am supposed to do. =D Imagine that coming on my last day of work! o.0

Lets see, I reached office at 7am this morning ( quite an amazing feat) which simply meant I woke up at 5.30am, and left house at 6. wow. Anyway, filled the vending machines and distributed all the papers in 15 minutes ( record timing) and was already in a taxi at 7.25am. Oh ya, I forgot to mention that the reason why I was doing all these stuffs out of the norm is that I was rushing to Temasek's swimming trials! Haha.

It was rather amusing to see the many year 1s who could not swim but tried to act or smoke their way through.

Just to disgress, my colleague just walked into the glass door at the corridor. =.= Ouch.

Anyway, I was sort of " lifeguard" for the begineers. Yup, lifeguard for begineers, in the training pool. If you do not know what it means by the training pool, it actually is the pool where you can easily stand, the one between the adult and the baby pool. Anyway, all you need to know is that people can actually STAND comfortably in it. Yup. And I was LIFEGUARD. Cool huh? Just idled by myself. It was interesting however to see so many people who hasn't touched water before, much less know how to swim. Perhaps being a swimmer in TJ for 2 years and a leisure swimmer outside almost the whole of my life has made me forgot the time when I first touched water, and made me believe that as humans, we were born to already know how to move in water and what it feels to be completely in water. In fact, I was somewhat shocked to see that there were people who did not know how to swim at all. I simply thought that being humans, it should be second nature to be able to move your limbs and actually move forward in water. Now I know I was wrong. That perhaps is the problem with having learnt swimming since I was so yound I forgot how it felt like the first time. =.=

Anyway I took the begineer boys and did some "water confidence drills" with them, which practically meant floating, holding your breath and actually trying to just move without touching the floor. I would say it was quite successful, quite an achievement. =D

After that rushed back here to Nestle and I reached at 9 and surprisingly, my supervisor was not in yet! I mean, even though he stays in Jurong, he has stolen the company car for himself coupled with the fact that working hours start at 8.30. In fact he reaches work at 10 on most days, hence today was no surprise, just relief ( I did not take leave at work to go swim! shhh) haha.

After that it was slack till after lunch, when staff purchase came in and I had to double as a labourer. Even up till the time I started this entry, I was still in the staff purchase room like a labourer, imagine that!! No one said in my job scope of doing manual labour!! Arrgghh!!

Well, at least all that is over. Oh ya, finally talked to the rather pretty lady in office today, to bad it is my last day! grrrr.. Very sweet looking, nice.. ahhhh... Curses and swears.. shall find her on friendster.. hehe. Oh wells, she is most probably 20+, little old, just very cute XD

Supposed to go down to ITE simei for a swim later but i doubt I will make it in time, most probably just go there to join them for dinner. Got mail to frank after I finish my receptionist job!! that means OT..aww.. also means money though.. Hence I don't mind.. hehe

Starting my first driving practical lesson next tuesday! Excited. Haha, I was even thinking to take a train back to Segamat a week before Chinese New Year so I could use my grandfather's car to practise. (evil grins*) Shall see how.

Oh hopefully the other beautiful lady at work will find me another job at Nestle.. hahaha.. Oh this office is filled with cute and chio girls, just a pity they are all 20+.. ahh... and mostly attached.. zzz... hahaha..

No no do not mistake, I am not desperate or anything. Its just, all that glamour that I have to pass.. Ahh.. Hahahaha. Damn I should be older.

Ha.

The Art of Living.

One day at work. Another seemingly normal cycle, yet so full of learning and meaning. It is these many one days that shape one into what he is.

I can't say that so many things have happened out of the ordinary today, however it is the so many things that I learnt that makes it so very different from yesterday or tommorow. It is indeed true that what you learnt today, you can never learn in the same way tommorow, nor could you have learnt it yesterday.

The first thing I learnt was the art of Living. What do I mean by that? It simply means that since I have only sort of "graduated" from schooling life into the real world jsut months back, I find myself surrounded by a completely different scenario.

The real world is not ruled by that of the theory books, that kindness begets kindness and evil begets evil. There will always be someone who will take advantage of your helpfulness and not repay you the same way you expect them to.

For instance, a collegue of mine offered 3 boxes of new year goodies to the cleaners yesterday. She clearly told them, take what you like and put the rest back in the refridgerator. THANK YOU. Well what happened? The obvious. When we searched high and low for the boxes today, the cleaner told us she brought it home. I mean, how thick-skinned can that be?? And more, how silly can my collegue be? Not that I am trying to criticise her or anything, for she is a nice lady with nice intentions, but never trust someone unless you are very sure he/she treats you as you treat them. Of all people, she had to offer them to the cleaners. When I saw her fustrated face today, part of me felt pity and part of me felt the reality of the situation. There are 200+ people working at Nestle. Imagine the number of different personalities. How can one be able to trust and give even without testing their sincerity and friendship. While I may be friendly and all, I find myself trying to feel if one is ally or but a mask. That should be the way in life.

You may say I am calculative. Untrusting. Yet I'd rather know who I trust than trust who I do not know. I will be a thousand times willing to give anything, if only I knew he/she would appreciate it and in certain cases repay me.

Working in such a big company has certainly taught me the art of Living. The art of adapting and the art of wearing a mask. Yes, wearing a mask means to be superficial and pretend. Evil? Not so. It depends on who you wear your mask to. Imagine a whole sea full of crocidiles around you. You have to pretend to be a shark, or they would certainly devour you. Only when you find the group who are vegetarians do you expose your true self. I know this analogy may seem ridiculous, but hopefully the meaning should be clear.

I have met my share of people, the tactless, the mask wearers, those who take advantages, the "elegant", the gossipers, as well as those who sort of " see people" before they decide on their course of action. Every single one requires a different act, an act to perfection, so as to not show that you do indeed know their wolf faces beneath the sheep skin. Smile, talk politely, sound friendly but not such that they think you want to be their friends. At times, even same something nice. Not too much, just to let them know you are not against them. If the act goes wrong. They may discover who you really are behind your mask, the risk involved. As such, the importance in perfecting the art of Living is phenomenal.

Of course I am not advising that one wages a war with the other party, nor do I encourage ignorance of their existance. After all, we are all working in one company and someday they will meet. Imagine the air of coldness, or the murderous glare in their eyes. Not something desirable. The trick is to acknowledge them, but keep them at arms length. Never ever let them know the person behind your mask.

Of course there will be those whom you will find to be true, the ones that appreciate your help, that know you are genuine and are genuine to you. Make more of such friends, gain connections, not to gossip, but to share the daily woes. It is indeed very hard to keep everything that happens in a day to oneself, for there is just so much in life. Sharing them with friends that you can trust is the key to happiness and support in times of fustration.

And also, try not to take what happens to hard. So what if someone takes advantage of you and steals your cookies? So what if one only acts nice to you because they know you are somebody? Never ever show that you know their true selfs. Take everything as a lesson. Keep yourself calm. Curse and scold in the bathroom but keep calm and firm when facing them. Let them know that I know what you did and I am alright with it but I do not like it. If they still do not get the hint, then just let them ignorant fools be. By knowing their true faces, you are already one step ahead of them.

Such things I believe, while present in minute forms in the schooling world, is much much more prominent in the real world. And such lessons need to be learnt. There is no use getting angry with everyone around you and showing your weak side to them. Smile and shrug it off. If your boss pisses you off, get out into a club with your true friends, bitch about him, and come up with ways to settle the problem sweet and nice, once and for all.

Hence I feel it is silly for those to quit just because they are unhappy with their bosses. After all, the longer you stay in a company, the greater a backing you will have against your problems. Let the bosses know that they too cannot work without you. As much as you respect him as a superior, let him know that he should respect you too.

It is a real complex world out there, just take in these lessons, one at a time. Mistakes will fade away but the lessons will always stay with you.




Anyway, will be working with Nestle until this Friday, that is until the person I am temporary replacing comes back. Today had sort of a farewell lunch with my aunties and her khakis. Most of them are pretty nice. One even offered to call me when they have expo fairs to hire me part time. =D

However I will definitely be missing all the time spent gossiping with the friends I made at work, laughing and bitching about evil people ( not gossip as in tell the whole world and not bitching as in degrading one in front of their bosses, but yea.) Definitely will miss the nice people in Nestle. I simply wonder how many of them will follow me as I move on in life. It may be saddening to know that most will not, but that is part and parcel of living. Hopefully, one or two may. =)

Anyway today at work, I was thinking about how I miss writing personal recounts and narratives in secondary school. Miss Mr Lee most of all, and all the technique, the magic and the satisfaction I get when writing those personal experience essays. Not that I am disregarding the satisfaction I gain from putting forth my arguments logically and soundly and strong in argumentative essays, but it is totally different. As I said, there is some kind of magic that engulfs me as I write personal recounts, as when I read novels.

Also I realised that I tend to want to know alot about the friends around me, not because I am kaypo, but because I learn from their life stories, where I gain insight to forming my own judgements and decisions. Ha. I personally do not have alot of personal experience, but what I do have is a large "dictionary of experience". Get what I mean? =)

If I could turn my brain into a novel, I believe there will be a whole collection of short stories, of which are mostly aren't mine. Truthfully, I haven't had many experiences in my almost 19 years of living that I can say I truly lived. My secondary school, while interesting has passed in a blur. Junior college life was good at the start, until the books started kicking in. So yea. However I do believe that I may have short stories of my own. I speak about the Temasek Swim Team. A big step into life, for finally I have friends that I really want for life. The hardships we went through, conflict and mistakes that made us so closely knitted today are definitely an unforgettable journey. Also, Chung Cheng Panther Scouts has been one of my better times too. I miss chilling out with my brothers, playing pranks, punishing and being punished, and all that stuff. Even though we were indeed " forced" to be brothers o.0 , but the things we went through really imprinted something in our lives. And even though I havent seen them in a very long time, I believe that at any time we should meet, we will be able to click as we were before. Those days, of happiness of freedom, of pride and of brotherhood, the everlasting memories.

Many ask where I get all that knowledge I have when I give advice. What I do not tell them is I got them from everyone around me. I ought to think myself as a novelist, inspired by the world around me ( haha =.=). But really, if you care to know, there is so much there you can gain without having to walk through it personally.

Oh yea, I have been looking at my previous post and I believe I have "sort of " repeated myself many times. This I have to apologise, for I tend to type whatever that comes into my mind at the instant. This is because I fear that these thoughts may disappear as fast and as unpredictable as the clouds in the sky. Throughout my days, I have had so many thoughts I wish to pen down but forgotten about when the time to pen them down actually comes. Perhaps I should be more professional to record these thoughts in a notebook. Ha.

And so if you should feel fustrated reading my entries, I apologise and sincerely hope that you will move on to another blog? Not that I am chasing you away, but please do not get mad at my way of thinking. Everyone is different and as an individual and unique being, each and every one of us should know that. =)


I think about so much, and I wonder, how do I still have the time to think about you?

The First post of A New Begining.

I have decided to delete all my old posts and start afresh again. Looking back, I realised how long a journey it has been, a fruitful, enriching, sometimes painful, but always beautiful memory that will always be a part of me. Perhaps the greatest lesson of all is indeed not taught in the classrooms but in our everyday lives, in and out, in knowledge or in ignorance.

Still, it has passed so fast, like a flashing beam. All that of what I feel importance in back then are but a cloud of thought that I look back now. I wonder, will life always be like that? Is what I believe in and fight for in the present so small a part of my life when I look back 30, 40 years down the road?

Yet I choose to believe not. What we do now, I believe, is an indication for what we are in the future. Is it not that people often look back on life and think " why did I not? " Perhaps if they had planned their actions with the future in mind, every bit executed only to the brim of perfection, then they may look back and smile.

However it is not human to be perfect. A piece of writing has it flaws, as is every human being. Often, things do not go your way. It may demoralise, or in the most devastating cases, kill the soul, to never be sought after again. Yet it is these crucial times that determines the smile or the frown many many years from the day. A simple rule: The determined will emerge victorious over the weak. It may seem rather cruel, even unjustified to determine weakness based on a moment of folly, but that is how it is.

Time waits for no one. It is perhaps the most merciless of all matter that humans have discovered with their talents. If you were weak in that moment, it will most probably come back to haunt you in your later years. Hence to be victorious, one must never give in to weakness, even if no one is watching. While it may sound rather skeptical, philosphical and even repetitive that I say this, it is but a basic theory in human evolution.

Darwin's theory of natural selection, I always remember.

" It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change."

Our universe, our Earth, revolves around this one fundamental rule that causes evolution and distinction of mankind. Who made us the superior race we are? I simply choose to believe nature is the " culprit" of all this. Everyday we see in newspapers, stories of geniuses, of prodigies, of so many intellectual creations we knew not of before. Human as a race is in the stages of evolution. I go the round to show simply that weakness is not a term accepted in our race to be superbeings of the universe.

Disappointment is not a weakness. It is what we do with it that determines. Mistakes too are not weakness. Human beings are in this sense not born with weaknesses. The downturns, obstacles that one faces in life are but justification to the right of the individual to a beating heart in this ever changing world. Simply, it is the certificate of survival. The key is to take setbacks with an open mind. Allow oneself different perspectives, modify goals to fit situations, change as the world changes. Turn the disappointing into the lessons in life. As long as one never gives up, it is almost impossible to deem that one has failed in life.

To give up, is simply not natural, for if one has given all his best, then he hasn't given up. It is the determination and courage we take to face life at the very instant that makes us successfully human. At this, I applaud the courage of those who have faced life's greatest devils, those born with defects, involved in accidents, or simply battling illnesses, and yet standing up against the walls of steel that so threaten to bury them. Me, an abled human being, may never know how much it takes to do so, for I have never been in such situations. Regardless of those who say they are prepared, I strongly believe that there is no preparation and no warning to the disappointment when one's dreams come tumbling down in a very instant. The loss of the ability to talk for a singer, the loss of the hands of a painist, the loss of legs for the climbers, and so many more. It is in these times of darkness where nature seperates the weak and the strong. It is certainly not that god has given up, but simply to test you of your worthiness to existence.

Life in all is beautiful, even for the blind and crippled. It is our level of realisation of this point that makes the difference in disappointment and happiness.

All this said, I still am unsure of my ability to cope with such situations, thats of course, god forbids, such situations do occur. ha.




Why did I decide to revive this blog? This blog that has died so long ago and loss all its loyal supporters. Thats PRECISELY the point why I decided to revive this blog. It is no longer about showmanship and all. I just simply wish to record down these moments in life that will soon become memories. It will be interesting to see what I was thinking today this time many years later. Anyway, my youngest brother had to start a blog too, even though it was for school assignment. The catch was to write the entries in full perfect, complete english. Haha. These new young teachers certainly have a way in teaching their students. Nevertheless, the thought of perfect and complete english attracted me. How satisfying and accomplished it will be to finally be able to blog in style. =D

Anyway, for those who happen to chance upon my blog, I am presently working in Nestle, but will be leaving in 3 days time. Hopefully, Esther may just find another vacancy for me soon. Keeping my fingers crossed.

However if I do not manage to retain the job, its fine. I have decided to train my stamina and take my driving liscence in the time between now and 9th April, my enlistment date into ns. Well, thats the plan and HOPEFULLY, I may adhere to it. =.=

Many things have happened in the past few days. Certain things have left me confused, wondering if all I did was right. The reluctance, all that " he he and ha ha" and stuff. The decision is a tough one to make, one I have pondered almost a year over. I feel that at present, I simply do not have the courage to do so. Maybe one day. Hopefully.

What I do now, I may regret someday. I know that, yet I do not dare choose. How do I decide something I feel could change my life so significantly while I do not know whats in store in the future. I am just not one to take risk. =( If only I have the ability to travel into the future. Ha.

Shall no ponder over this anymore today. I will take what my superior being has in store for me. Something I believe you all term as fate.
=)

Just for sharing, saw it somewhere and I thought it was beautiful:

If you're not the one,

then I know shes out there somewhere,

waiting for me to bump straight into her.

And when that time comes,

I know I'd be the happiest man on Earth.